Fortunate debtors

we are

I think I’ve written about this before. Or maybe I haven’t. Either way, I’m writing it now because it feels necessary.

How many times do we walk past a beggar and give something, some coins, whatever feels appropriate? Sometimes we even send our child to do it, as if we’re teaching them generosity, kindness, and how to help those in need. How many times have I listened to a street musician, someone playing and singing beautifully, and then, a little later, given something if I had it?

And then the thought creeps in: if God exists, does He see this? Did I do it for that? To earn some kind of points?

Is the whole system of belief somehow stained by the idea that someone might be watching, tallying up good deeds in some celestial ledger?

And how many times have I just walked past? Sometimes they even irritate me, regardless of the points I might have earned had I acted differently.

Why is it so inconsistent? This behaviour of ours is so volatile, so uncertain. In two identical situations, I can be a completely different person today than I was yesterday.

Do we have to give? Do we owe a stranger money we worked hard, or maybe easily, to earn? Do we owe them anything at all? Or do we act out of fear of God, or out of a fleeting moment of compassion that can just as easily disappear tomorrow, leaving us to pass by someone in need without even looking?

I think we do owe something.

I think those of us who can help must do so. Not for heavenly points, but for the sake of a deeper order in the universe that makes us human, in our best version. We are all, at once, the enforcers and the offenders, especially within ourselves. Yes, we owe that unknown alcoholic something. That addict who lies and stumbles through his story. We owe the children who cry because they have nothing to eat. We even owe those who might misuse what we give—because judging them is the easiest thing in the world, and it costs us nothing.

Those of us who can, many of us, owe those who cannot, and there are even more of them.

We owe because we can repay. And because, in the end, we are the lucky ones. The fortunate debtors.

Let’s not forget that.